Writing...
I love to write. It is good to get the thoughts out. I have always loved to write but my problem is I lack all direction in my writing. I have tried many ways. Writing for myself, writing on 30 day challenges, writing in a journal, making bullet journals, and still I have no direction. Now, I am not saying that I am J. K Rowling but there is a story locked in my head that I haven’t been able to release. I don’t know if the story is my story or if it is a fictional story...I just know that there is a story.
All of the things that I have read say to just start writing. Just put your thoughts out there. Just write, write, write. I am going to try to write more. I guess I use the blog. I have a new iPad and a Bluetooth keyboard so why not?
Lakeside Lunch
As she sat at the table she thought of her 5 senses and the way she had learned to manage her anxiety. 5...4...3...2...1... you are supposed to use your five senses to center or ground yourself. She an never remember the order of the five but at this moment it went a little like this. 5 things she could hear: The birds chirping. A young couple talking quietly, Distant church bells, Vehicles moving on the street and in the water, and a mother playing with her child. 4 things she could see: The smooth lake water, A man in a red shirt alone on a bench, A sign that reads “Docks Temporarily Closed”, Squirrels search for nuggets of food. 3 things she can feel: The uncomfortable bench digging into her bottom, The keyboard under her fingers, and the wind softly blowing a piece of hair and tickling her face. 2 things she can taste: The ice cold Coca-Cola next to her and the sour cream and onion potato chips. 1 thing she can smell: The smell of the lake, that smell of muddy water. All of these things remind her that she is here, on Earth, living a life that has ups and downs.
She has much to be anxious about and really nothing to be anxious about at all. She believes that in general life is a good. That life is a great adventure and that we are all just along for the ride. She knows that good things happen and bad things happen. No one lives a perfect life. The problem is that she, just like most of humanity, compares their good and bad to the next person’s good and bad like its a cosmic competition that we can win or lose. Really she knows that we are all a little broken and we are all a little whole.
She finds a little peace here by the lake. She doesn’t find as much peace by the lake as she does by the ocean but the lake is a nice break when time doesn’t allow for the ocean. As she has sat here that sounds and sights have changed. Life is like that, even when we don’t want things to change, things still change. That gives her the choice to let the change happen to change with it. The peacefulness was broken by a woman talking way too loud on a cell phone ruining the sounds and the revirere that she was enjoying. So now she is faced with a choice to stay where she is, listen to the woman talk, and continue to write or to get up and walk away. Does the need to empty the brain outweigh the annoyance?
Sometimes she has to endure the pain to enjoy the simplicity of the view. Isn’t there joy in that. Joy in taking time to still yourself and to enjoy the free things in life. As she has sat there she has used her five senses to ease the anxiety of the day. Maybe giving herself the push to keep going through the stress, the required tasks that have to be completed, and the need to bury her head in the blankets each morning and pretend she isn’t an adult with responsibilities.
As the Lakeside Lunch comes to an end and life comes back into focus, she is keenly aware that in this hour she was able to let the anxiety go. She was able to enjoy nature and watch others enjoy nature too. It is a simple reminder that even when she is all alone she is still part of a community.
All of the things that I have read say to just start writing. Just put your thoughts out there. Just write, write, write. I am going to try to write more. I guess I use the blog. I have a new iPad and a Bluetooth keyboard so why not?
Lakeside Lunch
As she sat at the table she thought of her 5 senses and the way she had learned to manage her anxiety. 5...4...3...2...1... you are supposed to use your five senses to center or ground yourself. She an never remember the order of the five but at this moment it went a little like this. 5 things she could hear: The birds chirping. A young couple talking quietly, Distant church bells, Vehicles moving on the street and in the water, and a mother playing with her child. 4 things she could see: The smooth lake water, A man in a red shirt alone on a bench, A sign that reads “Docks Temporarily Closed”, Squirrels search for nuggets of food. 3 things she can feel: The uncomfortable bench digging into her bottom, The keyboard under her fingers, and the wind softly blowing a piece of hair and tickling her face. 2 things she can taste: The ice cold Coca-Cola next to her and the sour cream and onion potato chips. 1 thing she can smell: The smell of the lake, that smell of muddy water. All of these things remind her that she is here, on Earth, living a life that has ups and downs.
She has much to be anxious about and really nothing to be anxious about at all. She believes that in general life is a good. That life is a great adventure and that we are all just along for the ride. She knows that good things happen and bad things happen. No one lives a perfect life. The problem is that she, just like most of humanity, compares their good and bad to the next person’s good and bad like its a cosmic competition that we can win or lose. Really she knows that we are all a little broken and we are all a little whole.
She finds a little peace here by the lake. She doesn’t find as much peace by the lake as she does by the ocean but the lake is a nice break when time doesn’t allow for the ocean. As she has sat here that sounds and sights have changed. Life is like that, even when we don’t want things to change, things still change. That gives her the choice to let the change happen to change with it. The peacefulness was broken by a woman talking way too loud on a cell phone ruining the sounds and the revirere that she was enjoying. So now she is faced with a choice to stay where she is, listen to the woman talk, and continue to write or to get up and walk away. Does the need to empty the brain outweigh the annoyance?
Sometimes she has to endure the pain to enjoy the simplicity of the view. Isn’t there joy in that. Joy in taking time to still yourself and to enjoy the free things in life. As she has sat there she has used her five senses to ease the anxiety of the day. Maybe giving herself the push to keep going through the stress, the required tasks that have to be completed, and the need to bury her head in the blankets each morning and pretend she isn’t an adult with responsibilities.
As the Lakeside Lunch comes to an end and life comes back into focus, she is keenly aware that in this hour she was able to let the anxiety go. She was able to enjoy nature and watch others enjoy nature too. It is a simple reminder that even when she is all alone she is still part of a community.
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